Girls, Gains and Growing Pains
Get ready to start working smarter and harder to achieve your fitness goals. In every episode, we break down common health and fitness questions in a fun and relatable way. Whether you’re a beginner or far along on your fitness journey, this podcast is for you.
Girls, Gains and Growing Pains
From Filters to Facts: The Every Day Reality of Weight Loss
In this episode, we get vulnerable by peeling back the Instagram filter to get raw and real about the trials of weight loss that don't make the highlight reel. We're not just talking about dropping or gaining pounds; we're delving into the mental game between quick fixes and lasting health, the lifestyle overhauls that often go unnoticed, and the community that buoys you through the roller coaster of transformation.
Follow us on Instagram @gggp_podcast and contact us by sending a direct message or emailing girlsgainsandgrowingpains@gmail.com!
This is Girls Gains and Growing Pains, a podcast about working smarter and harder to achieve your fitness goals. In every episode, we break down common health and fitness questions in a fun and relatable way.
Rachel:Whether you're a beginner or far along on your fitness journey, this podcast is for you. I'm Rachel Johns, a bikini bodybuilder, nutrition certified from Precision Nutrition and Nassim certified personal trainer.
Julia :And I'm Julia Ross, just a regular gal trying to get healthier and lose weight.
Rachel:It is important to note that neither of us are medical professionals, and the views expressed on this podcast are those of the host.
Julia :So today, I am very personally invested in our topic because we are talking about the difference between Instagram and reality when it comes to weight loss transformations. Now I do want to know it. Right at the top, we will be talking about restricting your calories, so if that's a sensitive subject for you, we recommend you skip right along until our next episode Okay. Are you ready? Oh my gosh, I'm so excited.
Julia :I literally we're just brainstorming topic ideas and this came up because Rachel and I are both very entrenched in the fitness Instagram world. So we get kind of a vibe, you know, and Rachel's been in fitness for a long time and I'm still like a baby to the environment and it is just fascinating the way that media talks about weight loss transformations and just the way it's portrayed.
Julia :So we really wanted to dive in today and talk about just from my perspective of someone who's lost a good amount of weight, and relatively quickly, and also from Rachel's perspective as a coach who works on weight loss transformations as well, and just really getting into what is the behind the scenes, what is the reality of weight loss transformations.
Rachel:It is. Weight loss is such a challenging, challenging thing to go through and it is emotionally challenging mentally challenging, it's timely, it takes time.
Julia :Effects your social life. Yeah, yeah.
Rachel:And there's a place that says fitness is a filter. Fitness is a filter. Finance is a filter, fitness is totally. It shrinks your circle, because when you stop drinking every weekend, you're not going out to bars, you're not with that crew of friends. When you get up every day at a certain time to go to the gym, those become your friends, and then you start being around more like-minded people, and then those people are like oh, let's go get lunch. Those start to become your people, and you just start surrounding yourself with people who have those same goals as you, and what's really cool, though, is having people around you that also have those goals, also understand what you're going through, and they can help you through those challenges, too, and so we did want to talk about how weight loss is not this simple, clear cut thing that people make it out to be on Instagram. People be like so I ate this, this, this I worked out, and now look at me.
Julia :And they're like Look at me go.
Rachel:That was not their journey. No, that was not how it happened. I don't know that it's happened for anyone that way, truly, and so we're going to talk about that first. So it's a full lifestyle shift. So how has your lifestyle changed?
Julia :So before I started on my weight loss transformation, I was living life just very I don't know if I'm pronouncing his name right, but like diagnosis, like the Greek god of wine. Just, I was a hedonistic person living my life to get the most, or what I perceived to be getting the most out of my life, and so I would glorify certain behaviors like oh, I'm sad about a relationship, let me eat ice cream. Or oh, I'm not feeling great today, so I'm going to go get blacked at a bar, like that was just my way of living.
Julia :And so what you don't see on Instagram are all of those moments where, once you start your journey especially right at the beginning when you go, and your neural pathways are wired to respond to stimulus in a certain way, you don't have to like see on your phone screen someone go through like the visual and visceral disappointment of being like wait, I can't have two mac and cheeses Trader Joe's right now, like what, and you don't get to see like the real time realization of how much your life is changing dramatically. You just see it go from point A to point B. You're like this was my old day and now this is my new day and you don't see any of those really buildable, stackable changes that have to be made. I mean, minute by minute makes it sound dramatic and exhausting. But losing weight is kind of dramatic and exhausting.
Rachel:So it is what I would say like an internal warfare with yourself, because it is like you're right, I want mac and cheese, but it's also like but I'm not supposed to, but that's what I want, but I also want to lose weight. So which one is exceeding the other in that moment? And those people that are like, well, this is what I eat now, like that's, that did not happen overnight.
Rachel:No no one, as far as it goes, cold turkey on their old habits and switches into the new ones. And for you it was a very transitional like phase. It did take a while to get into a full, completely new routine, especially with learning how to balance out your social life with these changes that we needed you to do to get to where you want to be. And making those changes was, I think, an internal battle with yourself, an external battle with me a little bit, yes you suffered long and hard to get me to this point, because I, I totally saw where you could be and you didn't see that.
Rachel:And I still tell you that I'm like, I still have plans for you that you are not aware of.
Julia :Yes, she literally will not tell me. They're like kept in a vault somewhere in your brain that I'm not allowed to know, like Taylor Swift.
Rachel:Let's mention Taylor Swift on every episode.
Julia :Every episode.
Rachel:Yeah, it's, it's truly. It's truly this battle with yourself, with your coach or your friends, whatever that looks like, to get to where you want to be. It is not an easy road and online the the visuals people give you have like 20 seconds on Instagram to post something and you're posting from point A to where you are now and people see that and they're like I want to do that.
Julia :Yep, it's very alluring.
Rachel:It's because people on social media want to see what they want to be and they automatically assume that it's really not that hard and they assume that a few little changes and maybe you know, exercising twice a week is going to get them to go down half their pants size, from like a 14 to like a seven. That's not how it works. Yeah, it's not really hard, long journey, but it is a very, very what's the word Like?
Julia :like rewarding A rewarding journey.
Rachel:That that is, I think, taking care of yourself and then looking back and being like look how I just treated myself, like I just loved myself so hard. Through those moments that are also like you have to love yourself harder than the temptations that are around you.
Julia :Yes.
Rachel:Which I think in the state age is really hard. It is hard to be like I am worth more than this craving right now Like my health is worth more than this. I think we we don't emphasize self care as our health. We emphasize as like going getting a facial or like shopping. Like self care is like I have this one body, yeah, I need to take care of, so it's like super. It's a challenging mindset to shift into of like okay, stop worrying about all these other things.
Rachel:Like let's focus on simply what I like, what is myself, yeah, and so you know it takes. It takes control and everything. So what? What is your perspective on how someone can go from this uncontrolled lifestyle essentially to to a more reined in lifestyle that doesn't feel just like depleting?
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:I know it's kind of hard question.
Julia :Well, it's the size, because there are moments where I I do miss just frolicking about for lack of a better word just carefree, like I. I think my perspective on my weight loss journey is very similar to like people before and after they have kids, where people will say, like, oh, I was so footloose and fancy free before I had kids and now I have my kids and I have less free time. But it was the best decision I ever made. Yeah, literally a weight loss transformation in a single analogy. So if you are out there and you're consuming this weight loss content on Instagram, I would just encourage you to use that as a habit cue where, anytime you get motivated by someone online or you see someone's results picture they're after photo. I know we're planning to take a very exciting picture tomorrow of me and my old size 22 jeans. I am now a size 10. Amazing, so like just mind blowing. So when you see stuff like that, use that as a very practical and this has been studied you can use it as a habit cue to drink more water. So every time you consume fitness content, drink more water. Every time you consume fitness content, add a healthier dish to your weekly meal prep. Just make that your motivation, and I think that's really the only way you can get.
Julia :I mean, people talk about the negative sides of social media all the time, but I think if you reframe your relationship with social media and use it as a really practical driver and propellant in your life, that would be my tip, because that was how I first got into the allure of weight loss, and the transformation was by seeing all of these people post their amazing results and I just continued to not do anything because I was like either A, it's so easy, I can just do it whenever I want. Like, whenever I decide to lose weight, I can just whip it out of my back pocket. Or B oh my gosh, it's so hard, I'm never going to be able to do that, so I'm just not even going to try. Like, as someone who's heavier, those two realities felt equally real and equally scary at the same time, and so I think that, like, improving my relationship with social media, using it as a cue, using it as a trigger, really helped me psychologically, physically and get the results that I was looking for.
Rachel:And kind of with what you just said too, is some people look at weight loss and they're like I'm not ready.
Julia :Yes, I hear that all the time. When people ask me about my perspective, they say, oh well, I'm just not like now isn't a good time. It's never a good time or I have an injury, like I also had an injury. I could not use my knee Like it was, it was busted and I also have shin splints from running inappropriately for like four years during high school.
Rachel:So that was on me Remember. High school sports caused all injuries.
Julia :The root of all evil high school sports. Yeah, yeah. So that's what I would say is just learning to You're never going to be ready?
Julia :No, you're never going to be ready. And I think another thing with the start and the propellant of your weight loss journey and the interaction with social media is you get and this is just on the studies today they study, and when you see someone else getting what you want, you get a dopamine hit or a serotonin. You know one of the happy, the good stuff you get a hit in your head of oh, that's exciting because you're living through their experience Exactly, and so it's really easy to just consume a lot of weight loss content because your brain will give you the happy chemicals.
Rachel:Yeah.
Julia :But then you're going to log out of social media and still be dealing with health stuff. So I think that's important to note too is it's easy to look at that content and get the high. But it's not. It's not real.
Rachel:And it's easy to to even come and be like wow, you're doing great, like, you go like and you see all these comments, but then they don't choose that for themselves. Yeah, it's like we need to talk to ourselves like that too. Like I love that you are starting to see your weight loss journey as like a positive like. Not like that, you just as positive. You just self talk so differently now.
Julia :So differently yeah, so differently yeah.
Rachel:You like. You look at your photos and you're so excited and you're happy and, yes, we still have places we want to go. Obviously, we're not at our end point. Yes, I don't think anyone's going to ever get to their end point.
Julia :No, that's the fun part, that's the journey, the journey of it, the journey.
Rachel:It's. You look at yourself so differently now than when we started, but you also, I think, are now turning into your own cheerleader in a sense where you. You finished your workout and you sent me all these selfies and you're like look how good, I look. Like. You didn't need someone on social media to tell you that anymore.
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:Like you were like I look good, like I feel good, like this was good for me, like this hard workout was good for me, and that that has been a shift from where things used to be really, really challenging for you to go through the gym and now you, you just know the rewarding feeling afterwards that you're able to get through it and you're able to take so much pride in it. Now, like, instead of being like like this just sucks, like I have to do this from because I was off the rails before. Now you're like dang, I'm killing it. Look where I am going.
Rachel:Like it is not coming from a place of negative self-talk. Your workouts Are coming from a place of gosh, I'm just killing it. Like that's. Like that's where your workouts are, like that's where, when you talk to me, I don't know if you even notice it Like the shift of of your mentality, of where your fitness started and where your nutrition started, to now where you're just like I'm killing it, Like I'm going to do these Bulgarian split squats or I'm going to do these shoulder presses, instead of just like like you can joke to me now about your sets. Like it used to really come from a place of pain.
Julia :I'm like it was fully traumatizing.
Rachel:Yes, but now, like you see me text and I just kind of laugh and I'm like she's saying this, but like I know she's going to get through this no problem, and be so excited and proud of herself, rather than that was hard because I didn't take care of myself. You're like that was hard, but like I am taking care of myself, not like this negative. Yeah, I mean, that's what's hard with weight loss, though is a lot of times your mindset is so like I did this to myself. I did this to myself.
Rachel:I did this to myself and it does take a real shift which is really hard to go from. I did this to myself like to. I am doing now this for myself Because people especially I've noticed with moms struggle with. I'm doing this for me because they're so nurturing and they have that maternal instinct to take care of their kids to finally step back and be like gosh, I gotta take care of myself.
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:I mean, it's like for me, it's like on the airplane.
Julia :put the mask on yourself first, yeah.
Rachel:Yeah, I mean, I go through, I talk to moms all the time and I'm like look, your kids are important, but you have to be there for your kids and if you are not showing up for yourself, like you will not show up for them. So and sometimes women come to me after their kids are adults and they're like I just neglected myself for 20 years. And here's where we're at. And now I love it when my clients come in every day and she says I'm showing up for myself.
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:And that's where our minds have to be. But that's a really challenging space to be because people feel like that's selfish and weight loss, the weight loss journey. I think it's okay to be kind of selfish in that.
Julia :Ooh, I like that.
Rachel:Because it is about you. Yeah, it's not about anyone else.
Julia :No, seriously though.
Rachel:You're not losing weight to please everyone around you.
Rachel:No, but to actually do something for yourself. That's kind of selfish, is also kind of a weird place to put yourself in. Like you did it for yourself. You're like I have to do this because my knee hurts when I walk. Like I'm going to make these changes. I'm not going to be able to go out with my friends every time they want to go out to like the bars and stuff, like and you know what? Like I'm going to have to skip hanging out because I need to get my workout in. Like those are selfish choices and quotes. Like those are just self care. No one's going to think twice. I feel like oh, I'm actually going to get a massage and a facial. But when you tell them you're going to them, they're like can't you skip? Yeah, you know, when someone says they're getting like a massage and facial, they're like oh, good for you. Well, I still have to go to the gym. They're like but can't you just like not?
Rachel:And that's where you have to kind of be that selfish and that's what's also hard about weight loss is no one talks about, like the support around you, like you have to take your own control of things.
Julia :I think that's where we should shift the conversation. Next is how people talk about you going through weight loss journey, and I'm going to keep using the child birth analogy of like weight loss being like having a child and how it's hard, but it's the best decision you made.
Julia :When you start transforming your body, whether you're losing weight, bulking, people will comment. For better or worse they will comment, and the reason I call this to pregnancy is, just as a woman, I have seen so many of my friends go through conversations with people where they will simply say the words I am pregnant and then they will get hit with a deluge of well, are you going to do this? Well, I did it this way. Well, this didn't do this for me, but, like, the human experience is so unique, like we, yeah. So that's something that comes up for me a lot with social media is I get. Now I'm at a point where people are noticing my transformation and people are talking to me about it and you have to be really careful with how you process this new kind of information about how the world is reacting to your transformation.
Julia :Again, whether you're bulking, losing the physical change, like for me it was. It sounds so dumb because I'm on social media, but it was the realization. I was like people perceive me, like I'm being perceived, like what? That's such a mind trip, like that's crazy, and it just like it blew my mind. I was like, wow, like people, people noticed. Because I think something that I like came in the realization of the other day was when I was heavier. I just had this like thought that like if I didn't notice, no one else would you know. Like if you have pets, when, like, the pet will like hide behind a curtain or hide behind something and just their eyes are covered and you can still totally see them, but the pet thinks they're invisible, like that was how my weight gain felt, or I was like if I just ignore it and never look at myself in the mirror and never address my decision making or the portraits as I made that copy here, no one else will notice and that just wasn't.
Julia :That wasn't true. And even like people will obviously say nicer things to your face, you know, but I just like I freaked out and was like whoa, like people have been looking at me and it wasn't even like a oh, like I hated being fat or no, like it wasn't. It was literally just. It is amazing how much other people notice bodily changes.
Rachel:Absolutely yeah. And what's funny too is when someone gains weight, they will dance around that yeah, the second you start losing weight, people believe that now they have this free reign to make unsolicited comments and opinions about all of it, which is very you. You've witnessed that.
Julia :I've witnessed that where it's like because you've gone through cutting, which, for bodybuilding, is where you are losing weight, so you've got your muscles are more exposed, like. What kind of comments do you get?
Rachel:Just an array of like I guess, like I don't mind when some like a female comes up to me and they're like oh hey, you look really good yeah. Or wow, like you look, like you've. You've really leaned out like, how do you do that? Like then I can educate. But, sometimes, when it's like a male that's like, hey, you lost some weight, you know, kind of like that.
Rachel:I'm like, like I don't know that we needed you know we could have framed, we could have raised things differently, and I think it also just like shines a light on like feeling like people are watching you and it does create like a little bit of an anxious feeling because I know, because through me I, my weight does fluctuate for my sport and so that gets in my head all the time is I'm like okay, we're increasing my calories, I'm probably going to blow a little bit more this week and people are going to notice, like I already know.
Rachel:They're going to notice because they've noticed every little change in my body in the past. Now, given I have gotten very good at tuning that out, which has taken time. It's a life skill. It is not like immediate that you can just be like yeah, it doesn't matter what people say, because people do have their opinions and people have their opinions about what I should look like. That's when I'm really like you can keep that one to yourself and that's that's for anyone listening Like if it is something that could be taken as non affirming or like you know something like, oh wow, like you know, You're looking really strong.
Rachel:Sometimes I'm like, are they saying that, as like I'm getting larger? Or they're saying, where are they coming from with that? It's kind of just like, just kind of leave it alone.
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:Just ask me how my day is instead.
Julia :Well, and I think it's important to note too, especially like as someone who's out there like posting weight loss transformation content, like I love and appreciate all of the comments that are like you go girl, like you're doing great, Like keep sending that love and light out into the world, Like don't stop doing that. Just be aware when you're engaging with people's journeys and content on social media. Just I mean for me, a lot of my weight fluctuations previously were medication related.
Julia :So, I would need to take a medication that would empower me to be able to do my job because of my mental health, and then that would cause me to drop a ton of weight.
Julia :Or I would take a medication that would cause me to gain a ton of weight, and so it's just like it's kind of the same thing as also the pregnancy coming up again. Don't ask a woman if she's pregnant just based on how she looks. Oh my gosh, just like it's. When you make an assumption, it makes an ass out of you and me. So just be kind and conscientious and thoughtful when you're engaging with people who are on fitness journeys.
Rachel:Yeah, honestly, the beautiful Whitney Simmons. Ok, you know.
Julia :I love her, my queen.
Rachel:She is just one of the most in the human beings.
Julia :Yes.
Rachel:And I've been very grateful to meet her twice now. She just posted on her story because she's gained a little bit of weight. Yeah, looks phenomenal still, truly, and she's so strong Like. She's strong Like if you watch her videos and you're actually looking at the way she is. She's so strong. But people are commenting like, oh my gosh, is she pregnant? She looks like she's put on like 30 pounds. They're putting this on her page. Oh my god, I'm like that is so, so uncalled for Like.
Julia :I'm sorry.
Rachel:No one cares about your opinion, about that. No, I'm sorry. No, like that was so, so unnecessarily rude. And I think it's great when people are losing weight and people are so encouraging and kind and, yes, maybe they want to know how you did it and say, hey, do you have any tips for this? Or like whatever. I think that's awesome. I love when people ask me how, like, where they can improve, and I love that where there's like actual genuine interest, where it is not some unsolicited comment about, like, my weight, and I think there's a beautiful way to go about affirming people.
Rachel:Like you've seen that where people can affirm you and make you feel so good and like encourage that, because we want to nurture, like healthy lifestyles and promote that and, like I have always said this, that Whitney Simmons I think absolutely is the vision of what fitness should look like, because she promotes mental health awareness and she promotes like taking care of your body with the foods that you're eating like feeling good. She likes to do her makeup for the gym.
Rachel:She's like I own that, yeah, she has these things that she loves and people just are so. So unnecessary People be crusty there, but I'm like there, like Whitney Simmons, has been so influential for me so I'm very protective of her.
Julia :Yes, no see, that's me with Renee Rapp, because that was another like social media discourse situation where, if you don't know, renee Rapp played Regina George on the Broadway rendition of Mean Girls and people made comments about her being too heavy for the role. And just social media, obviously, like took it way too far. And then when she got cast in the Mean Girls movie, people said like, oh, like, if Regina George is X size or whatever, like that, I'm blah it. Just it was crazy. So, yeah, if you're interacting with like, because I think it's easy to just fall into like weight loss, and then we can have a whole conversation about weight loss, but like weight gain and bulking and fluctuations in your weight, I think all those go hand in hand. Yeah, like it's social media has really just exacerbated the entire conversation around those.
Rachel:I think it's just like that phrase, like be a light when you're like talking about social media.
Rachel:Like whatever the topic is like, there's no reason to tear people down and it's always reason to say something positive and encouraging. And if you're really curious about hustle and loss weight, like DM them. Maybe you don't have to publicly put it on their post, Like what, if it's it might be hard to phrase for you or whatever. Like DM them and explain yourself, because that stuff mentally can really like, like we said, like weight loss is really really hard. So then, people who are willing to share that experience with the world, that is a very vulnerable place to put yourself in.
Julia :Yes.
Rachel:And there is a way that everyone else can nurture that vulnerability so that they can inspire other people. Like you said, seeing from transformations really spikes your happiness levels and stuff, so it's a great one. We can encourage people to do that so that other people can't get into courage. So we're improving the quality of life of so many people and I know you've experienced people messaging you being like I got on the stairs today because you're really inspiring me, like those are amazing feelings, so it's great that you post it. I love that you post it. I encourage you to post it. I encourage my clients to post it, because other people get really, really inspired by that.
Rachel:And it's those few rotten eggs that decide to throw in their unsolicited comments and their opinions on how you should do it. Because it's funny that they also do that, because you're making very good progress, you're living a very healthy lifestyle now and people still want to like, throw in their little like, tidbits of like. Well, you should do this.
Julia :Yeah, or have you considered why, or Z yes.
Rachel:And we've talked about that even on the last episode with having a coach is your journey is between you and the person you chose it to be in and letting these flood of comments and suggestions. I think it's great that you asked me questions because you'll see something on social media and be like what do you think about this?
Julia :Oh yeah, it's like a little the Snopes fact checker. I'll be like okay, whoa, whoa, I'll send it to Rachel.
Rachel:Yeah. So it's great to have your coach that you are consulting in so that you can stay focused on where you're at and then you know it's easier to block out those opinions, because I don't think we're ever going to really stop them. But when you're, when you can stay dialed in and then provide for yourself what you need with your coach but then provide you know, education or inspiration or whatever it is looking like on social media, then it kind of it just works really well. And I think, like I have a lot of clients who who look to social media.
Rachel:I I do, yeah, like I go on my phone sometimes for like 15 minutes if I don't want to work out and I will sit and I will go to my explore page, on my fitness page, which is all bikini bodybuilding.
Rachel:That's all it is Okay and I scroll there and I'm watching these workouts and I'm like you know what? I've got big goals, yep, big goals, and we're going to go do this, and that helps me and therefore I really appreciate other women who are willing to put themselves in a vulnerable position on the internet to be judged and inspire me with that, and I think you do that, even if you don't really realize how much you're being vulnerable and inspiring people and like that. Some people look to your content when they need motivation and you're an example of like oh, look at her, she did it so easily.
Julia :And I'm like no, no, no you're like you don't have to be on the phone with this girl.
Rachel:Which I will do time and time again. But it is not this like beautiful journey, like it's not rainbows and butterflies. It's not like when you're walking through, like the Wizard of Oz movie, where they're walking through like whatever the flowers are and fall into a beautiful dream.
Julia :It's not like that.
Rachel:It is like fighting the munchkin monkeys, or whatever the heck they are on the Wizard of Oz, like it's a really it's a battle. Yeah, it's totally a battle, and I think you've done a great job of balancing all of these components that come with it. And so how, how are you so far doing with you know people giving you their own opinions, keeping them out of your head when you're, you know, operating day in, day out?
Julia :I have learned that I am really good at remembering negative comments, like to the boy my junior year of high school who sat behind me in chemistry and told me I would be pretty if I wore less eye makeup. If you're listening, I hope you have a bad day, I hope your day sucks, I hope you stub your toe and I hope you get mascara in your eye Like that's. That's what I hope for you. And so I aren't. With this knowledge that I hyper fixate on negative comments, I have learned through my fitness journey that I need to be the one to wait the positive comments more, like no one's going to come and, you know, finagle with my brain chemistry to make me care more about positive comments. And so it's really. I mean just the word journey over and over again. It's a journey of appreciating the kind and sightful, encouraging, uplifting words, putting more weight in those than the. You should be doing this or you still look X, Y or Z.
Rachel:I agree, and with that, too, I think it's learning to place value in the people that really matter to you, because this is the only one that do.
Rachel:And for me it was really, really hard going into bodybuilding because a lot of things change and I have always been that mindset of like, just whatever opinions are I, that's what I take. Yeah, and I had to learn like two opinions matter for me. Okay, in a way, guys, yes, my coach, that matters. And in my calcics, there you go, you, your, I'll get the and everyone else. Thanks for the. Thank you for the compliments and I do appreciate them. But people who talk negatively to me about my body, I don't care, yeah, I don't care. Like I always say this this is so like my shoulder's better than yours, anyway, so Get away with stings.
Julia :I'm like I'll see you doing lateral raises on the floor, yeah.
Rachel:Bye, that's what I've had to tell myself to say that myself, though I have to figure out whose opinions are important to you and and who's like. I hope my, I hope my opinion is more important to you than most people's. To be honest with you, Truly truly. Because, because I'm the only one watching you that closely no one, no one else.
Rachel:I am watching you more closely than anyone else Like therefore therefore, if I'm telling you, like you came up today, I was like, oh my gosh, you look so good. I haven't seen like two weeks yeah. And and Trump's. Every other opinion you get this week. It does. It does Because it is so, so easy to let these random people on the internet's opinions affect us and the people that see us every day in all of our hard work and like actually even see us in person, like those are the opinions that matter. Yeah, but it's really hard to you know.
Julia :I just said the foul like. Wait till these internet jerks find out about how focal length works or how flattering mirrors can be, like you said.
Rachel:You mean at the chicken teriyaki place? What a flattering window.
Julia :That was so funny. Yeah, I it's, it's crazy. And I think another thing to just less like aesthetically and more process wise. I know that when I have shared, either on Instagram or just with people, a lot of the reality of weight loss which is for me was calorie counting and tracking macros. And that's not glamorous and it's hard to talk about because we have so much cultural sensitivity around it, but it is truly the reality of weight loss and I think that was where, like, having you as a coach was really really helpful, because if I had listened to like never track anything ever which is what like the majority of the narrative online that I was consuming was and I get, like it's cultivated information, like I get that I was hearing what I wanted to, because it's, you know, it's cultivation theory.
Julia :It's just it's giving me what I want. But I needed to have like yes, I needed a voice of reason to come in and say like, hey, this is going to be okay and it is possible to do things like track your calories, like track your macros, like taking progress pictures and zooming in on certain parts. Like we really demonize those behaviors as a society and I fully, as someone who has struggled with so many of those things like I get the challenge and you need to protect yourself first, always, but just know that some of those behaviors can be done healthily and with great results.
Rachel:No, I totally agree, and I think, I think that it comes with having someone to get to know you, to know your behaviors.
Rachel:When maybe you're starting to fall off a little bit and maybe you need to be put back on and like where maybe you're struggling. Maybe you're struggling with the calorie counting, maybe it's it's it's triggering you or something. There's other ways that a coach can make sure that you're eating the appropriate amounts without needing all the calories trapped. Like starting with mindful eating, starting with just a consistent breakfast every day. Yeah, there's ways they can go about that. And you're right, there's like a very big movement, I guess, on social media, where it's like don't track what you eat, don't just eat when you're hungry, but the thing is like there are so many dimensions to hunger.
Julia :Yes, like you're hungry for a lot of reasons.
Rachel:Yes, and so it's just. There's a lot of misguidance happening. To stay in line with what people want to hear yeah, to stay with the zeitgeist. Yeah, and because what you've learned, too, is like you're this, this you've learned that weight loss is so so, so much about food, oh my gosh.
Julia :So much about food.
Rachel:And that if you were going to try to lose the amount of weight you've lost right now, let's calculate that. Let's calculate that. So you've lost around 60 pounds, okay, mm-hmm.
Julia :That we know of, because I did not weigh myself at my heaviest, Because you know I mean, if you're listening, I've been there, it's. It sucks sometimes.
Rachel:So since July to now, if you were still eating the same and just focused on weight loss through the gym, just through the gym, not wanting to change any of your other habits, to lose 60 pounds you have to be in a total deficit of 210,000 calories. To lose 60 pounds over that time of July, that means, like your gym time had to not only exceed the calorie burn of you, what you were eating, but it had to overcome all your basal metabolic rate, your active metabolic rate, and get down essentially 210,000 calories by now. Oh my gosh.
Julia :With just the gym.
Rachel:So if you don't change your food, then you are relying on the gym, and that's where people get burnt out. Because, first of all, your let's say your gym workout is like 900 calories.
Julia :Which it often is.
Rachel:But even on a day because we have it, you're eating like 4,000 calories, oh girl that was pre the large ICO.
Julia :I would treat myself to every night, so I was eating just for reference, and this is very much my testimonial on why I personally think that tracking your calories is beneficial, especially at the beginning. We especially if you're listening in America we have an unhealthy cultural relationship with food and we do not receive proper nutritional education in school. It's just, it's not, it's not it. It's not it. Like I really didn't need to learn about physics.
Julia :I wish I had learned more about how to nourish my body and you know pay taxes, but I'll take what I could get at this point like I. Just it's frustrating. So you need to track at the beginning, because when I started tracking I found out that One meal would be the equivalent of what I eat in an entire day. Now. Healthily, like, within reason, like what I eat now is very healthy. I'm eating more calories that I technically need to sustain my weight and high more nutrient dense food.
Julia :Literal nutrients in my body. Hello, protein in my body. Like since when? What? So I, I started tracking and it's just it's building an awareness, like learning about nutrition, and you can't even think about it that way, like don't think of it as like, oh, I'm learning about what foods are bad, because that's not what's happening. You're learning about nutrition and so I would discover, like I I try and avoid like safe food language and you know that's like, you know it's I, just I Try and avoid it because it you can fit anything in your macros. That's, that's something we also talk about. Like that's also not talked about on social media. I feel like like people will say like, oh, like I'm like we can even take earlier my Trader Joe's frozen mac and cheese. I now eat the Trader Joe's reduced guilt frozen mac and cheese and fits in your macros perfectly fine perfectly fine.
Rachel:I will openly say the past week I have had to tag along Girl Scout cookies every night, yeah, but I Am also giving myself good protein and carbs and vegetables during the day and that's Kind of what you were saying is like we're eating nutrient dense food and I think there's this misconception. I don't know if it's because of like foodies or whatever is that? Your food, regardless of what journey you're on, is your fuel.
Julia :Yep.
Rachel:If you are fueling yourself with pizza and Twinkies and soda Like you're not gonna have energy.
Julia :I did not yeah.
Rachel:It does not take rocket science to realize that those things are not going to fuel your body.
Rachel:Mm-hmm and that's where it really it was really hard for me as a coach is people like I want to eat what I want to eat and I'm like but you feel it crap, like you don't sleep well, yeah. And like you're your skin is dry or whatever, and like you're Breaking out and you don't feel good and you have digestive problems and you get headaches. And I'm like, because you're giving your body crappy stuff, yeah, like what did you think was gonna happen, right, mm-hmm. And then when you give yourself good foods and you see it as energy, like food is still in there, you can enjoy your food.
Rachel:Yes, please enjoy your food at the end of the day, though, it is your energy source, so you're not gonna give your kids Like that's what I was thinking of what you're gonna give your kids or your animals. People feed their animals better than themselves.
Julia :Okay, the protein and dog food, though. The all of those means there's. There's so much protein and dog food like my dogs are.
Rachel:Someone told me they're like you feed your dogs dry food, and I said I do. They're outdoor dogs. Yeah and they're like oh my gosh, I don't do that. And I was like okay, but don't you eat McDonald's like four times a week? I'm an honest coach, I am, but I'm like that is poor fuel for your body. That's actually more of a depletion. Yeah rather than giving yourself fuel and and I know it's a hard topic for you, it's it is hard because it kind of calls you out.
Julia :I'm like having like a physical reaction as we're having this conversation, like just it's so interesting. It's just like, oh like, for we're so conditioned and I think part of it too with like social media narratives Is we're so conditioned that weight loss and getting healthy is all or nothing. It's either don't track your calories ever, ever eat what you want and like that's what the way it's gonna be, or it's Never have anything that brings you joy. Ever again eat boiled chicken. No, rachel finds joy in her boy chicken cheese.
Rachel:She's my stomach likes it. I know I don't have to, just a problem. So I need it and but I think that's right, like Social media and commercials and stuff have created this, this glamorization Around fast foods and these yummy foods and like foodies eating, you know, these very fat, fatty foods.
Julia :When you told me about how much fat is in restaurant foods I was Florida I was like no wonder it tastes so good yeah you're right.
Rachel:And it's just like this glorification on those things and it's like what if you just like fueled your body with good food?
Rachel:like think of how productive you're gonna be, think of how good you're gonna feel, think of what you can accomplish when you eat the right things. Yeah, cuz that's literally the only source for your energy. It's like the foods you're consuming. And if you're taking care of your dog better than yourself, like you need to take them a step back, yeah. And even if you're taking care of your kids better than yourself, like you have to take care of your kids, but you, you have to care yourself. You want to take care of your animals. I love my animals, but like I have to care myself first. And you know, even in my relationship, like I Get him good food, yes, and I'm like, and we sit down. I'm like, so did you get enough protein today? Like those are the, those are the? That's like a question I'll ask because, no, it feels you up, it makes you feel full, it gives you energy.
Julia :He's a, he works a lot Mm-hmm, and I'm like I need my people to be good and you told that was part of what convinced me was you were like, look from a place of love, like I need you to be healthy, like I need my friends to be healthy, and you were very gentle about it. But it was just, it was very clear that I was unhealthy, like it wasn't a physicality thing. I just I. I was unhealthy and I knew it and everyone around me knew it, and it was just a lot of cognitive dissonance keeping me from Taking the plunge but now you live a lot more balanced, where you can go out with your friends.
Rachel:I did last night you did last night and it's not gonna set you back.
Rachel:I'll be back to point A no because you have these other habits that are in place and you're feeling yourself and make yourself feel good. And Now, yeah, sure, maybe if you want to have a good here tonight, where maybe before I would have been like no, no, no, mm-hmm, you can, because Because you know how to eat now, yeah. So if there's such a balance, because you can still enjoy the things like I I Love chocolate and peanut butter and stuff yeah, so there's a balance of okay, I can portion that out, have a little bit of that, fix that craving, still enjoy my day. Even I still go on dinner dates. Yeah, like I Don't. I don't feel like I'm lacking anything.
Julia :Yes.
Rachel:I'm not like I feel good.
Rachel:I have really good workouts, my body feels good and All these things come together and I'm I'm still like I'm eating a lot of food still, I am monitoring my food still and I have consistency, but I'm still able to eat, you know, like my tag-along cookies that I have right now like it can be a super balanced lifestyle, but but, but this is what this is, what, um, the other practice that I like said they were like Balance is not Eating whatever the heck you want and like doing some like walking at the gym, kind of like you've said before, like I would Walk like 20 minutes and pat myself on the back like that's not a balanced lifestyle.
Rachel:No, like a balanced lifestyle is taking care of your body Cardiovascular system, muscular or everything like that and then taking care of what it needs by feeling at the right things and yes, if you need sometimes like a little snack here and there. Like that's a balance, that is a beautiful balance and that is a maintainable balance. And my clients have learned that because they can go on vacation and Not gain weight and feel really good about themselves and like have a wonderful, beautiful vacation and come back, and so they're like yeah.
Rachel:Still feeling good, like it's a beautiful balance.
Julia :I lost weight over Christmas break, like I. I guess that I was so scared for Christmas break and I just I learned and I think it's hard too, because just bringing it back to social media, like I will not post the two slices of Domino's pizza and have a donut that I had when I went to my friends like party the other night, like I'm not gonna Pose it and do a little flat lay you know, take a little picture for me so you're not seeing that side of it.
Julia :Like I promise you, I'm still living my life like it's still Good. Things are happening to me, but they're only happening because I'm not Doing the behaviors that I used to do in excess. So I think that's important to keep in mind, like when you see those super aesthetic meals or you see the transformation photos. There were Things that you didn't see.
Rachel:There's a lot of the story. Most of us are not fully true.
Julia :Yeah, I think every day I think about doing one of those and then it's like 11 and I'm just having my, my Oikos protein yogurt and my power bar and I'm like mmm aesthetic, yes.
Rachel:Yeah, but it works and it fuels you, like that's kind of where you go to, and I know we're kind of running out of time. This has been a good discussion, so let's talk just a little bit about something that I think everyone at first is like I want to do that. Mmm Is checking photos.
Julia :Right.
Rachel:That is one thing with my online clients that a lot of them get scared to do at first. And if you don't know what a checking photo is, you can wear like spandex shorts, sports bra, your guy, you can wear shorts whatever that looks like, or bikinis, whatever, and you face forward, sideward, back and another side and they are not glamorous shots. Okay, nope.
Julia :I take mine at like four in the morning sometimes, and I send them to my coach and I'm like I was barely awake during this. I was not cogent. Like pay no mind.
Rachel:But those are really really great for the person who is currently doing the weight loss journey. Because if you posted your checking photos every week, people would be like nothing's really changed, because week by week it's hard to see those little changes. But then if you look like you post your six months ago versus now, I'm like wow, that's amazing. But for you and whoever your coach is can look at those photos and even though they're super awkward to take, I get that to my core.
Julia :It's very humbling. It's very humbling, but it's also very rewarding eventually which is amazing.
Rachel:So if you even don't even have a coach and you're just like I'm going to start making changes, take progress pictures, like wherever you're at, take them fasted in the morning when you wake up. Just get those photos taken, because I think they make a world of a difference. I don't know what do you think?
Julia :I've spoken about this a little bit before on the pod, but I personally struggled with looking at my before pictures in a hateful lens, and so I think it's really important that if you're starting your progress picture journey, that you do not smack talk day one. You no know. Like. That does not allow. Do not and I've also complained about this before and I will do it every single time.
Julia :If you are a famous fitness influencer, please stop hating on your before pictures. Like, please stop, please, like. This is an impassioned plea. Do not hate on that, because everyone is at a different point in their fitness journey. I'm on so many social blogs or wherever, where people are like I'm so mad that I gained so much weight and now I'm insert Julia's current weight after like losing weight for months, and I'm disgusted with myself. I'm like, okay, everyone's experience is relative and I understand. Like I, too, freaked out when I went from like 135 to 145, was like the world is ending like this. Oh no, you know. So I just it's really important when you go about taking your progress pictures, to bask in the glow of what you have done for yourself and not take that time to use them negatively, because all of the stuff we've talked about today. The reason it gets negative discourse online is because it's easy to like leverage them negatively. Yeah.
Julia :Even, even like comedians, bash talk themselves like as a as like a coping kind of thing. Yeah.
Rachel:But also with something that you just said. That's to remind me is one thing that I think is also really difficult with the photos is you have them now, but a lot of times we compare those to our even earlier photos, when we were maybe thinner or maybe you know before, that was me.
Rachel:I know that was me Speaking of experience, and so I think it's good to say you know what, like I appreciate where it was, I know where I'm at now, but I know where I'm going. And to look at it that way, instead of being like I can't look at myself here from that point, like when did that change happen?
Rachel:Yeah, it's more like okay, we were there, we can get back there, but we're starting here and this is what we got to do, kind of that mindset of like, not just looking back and like, oh, that was such a good time, like I remember when I yeah, whatever I could eat whatever I wanted and look like people always say that to me.
Rachel:They're like I still eat whatever I want. Or like when people title me, they're like yeah, you're lucky, you can still eat whatever you want. And I'm like I don't know what you're eating, but I eat boiled chicken every day. So people tell me all the time like you're so lucky, I'm like am I?
Julia :Luck has nothing to do with it. I actually thank you, though.
Rachel:My house constantly smells of boiled chicken. I can attest. To come and have the camera, even literally, is like Rachel, please stop Boiled chicken.
Julia :Everyone makes fun of my boiled chicken.
Rachel:But I think with all the progress but back to that Back from our little boy Is there still, even with progress, even with having the pictures visually in front? Of you is there still so much body dysmorphia that happens? And this is probably our last little tidbit, because we are yeah.
Julia :Body dysmorphia is going to be its whole own episode.
Rachel:Yeah, because that is something that I think everyone just goes through, no matter what journey you are in your life. No one is safe from body dysmorphia it's really hard and Julie and I have been having a lot of open discussion about it on our own time.
Rachel:I guess We've been dissecting that and how do we manage that? And it fluctuates, because there are some days where I know from what you've told me is you have some days where you are just like, oh, am I really, you know, do I need to do more? Like, do I need to do this? And I'm like, no, you're doing great, don't, don't rush the process. And there's other days where you're like, oh, my gosh, look how ripped that. Do you see this shoulder muscle?
Julia :And I'm like yeah, I do. You're like, I see it every day, Thank you.
Rachel:And like this does look the same as yesterday when you were negatively talking, but, yes, still the same today. So let's just dissect that for a second.
Julia :Yeah, real quick.
Rachel:It's funny because it's just like we're so in our heads and I totally relate to you on this because I also have this. They told me that when I start bodybuilding, they're like like the body dysmorphia gets more real as you get in more shape.
Julia :Yeah, you told me that and I was like there's no way, there's. And then I got in better shape and it came from me, it came from my throat.
Rachel:Literally today she was standing in the mirror. She's like, um, so, what's, what's this?
Julia :She's like grabbing her arm and I'm like you're like could it be body fat because of human?
Rachel:being yeah, I'm like I don't know what you want me to tell you right now, like the blood, and I'm like you're half your size right now. Like, yeah, like, let's let's, let's reel it in. Keep some perspective here. Yeah, let's remember that these pants used to fit tightly and now they they're loose and they are so scrunched. Yeah, and you know, I kind of throw each other back in.
Julia :Yeah.
Rachel:So okay, so with that, what I guess, self evaluate a little bit.
Julia :What is?
Rachel:changing day to day where some days you feel really really good and some days you, you know, maybe don't feel so good.
Julia :It. I love when memes just perfectly encompass the situation. I posted a meme on my fitness page the other day and it was all right. What is it going to be today, god? Complex or body dysmorphia? Because that's really like you wake up and one just chooses the day for you. And I think what's been helpful for me is I will never conquer my need for external validation. I will never conquer it. It's it's the hill I will die on.
Julia :I. I like it, okay, I like when people say nice things to me, so I think it's I hope, to report back on, maybe podcast episode 25 of how much more intrinsically motivated I am, but in the meantime it is something that I struggle with and it's also it's it's such an amorphous like concept because it's also independent of what other people say, because sometimes when I get an influx of positive comments, I try and emotionally balance it out by being negative to myself, because I'm like, oh, your head's going to get too big and you're going to. Really, what's the worst thing that could happen if your head gets too big? Like you're going to be fine, you're going to live, you're just going to be confident, whatever you know I always tell Efran.
Rachel:I said I think everyone in the gym I just want to miss yesterday yeah. I said everyone in the gym should just have a little sprinkle of narcissism. Yes just a little bit, just to keep you intrinsically motivated.
Julia :Yes, yes, I am my own Jim Crush.
Rachel:Damn it Like yeah, but you're right, you do tend to you when, when you feel over validated, you start to unvalidate that by going into like, okay, transparency. Julien's dating.
Julia :This is true.
Rachel:And, oh god, really attractive, good looking guys. You know you've been going out with you go. Do you think they just date me because they think I'm desperate?
Julia :I was like, do I just look so mid that guys think that he could sleep with me right away? Like do I just look mid as though it's happening?
Rachel:And I just am shocked that that's where your logic goes, because I'm like no, julia, of course, that's like that's the total opposite. Like you're, you're super smart, you're beautiful, you know like. I'm sitting here like that infeligents is just outrageous. I'm sitting here like also, it's like people who've never even met you before and you're just like he's only liking me, because I'm like what? What just happened? I'm like go from what. I'm like that doesn't even like. I'm like Julia, you're a catch, what is happening? It's just. It's just this, this thing that we deal with. It's this dysmorphia that we are being perceived a certain way and that's totally not true. Because then there's other times where you know we're taking photos and you're like dang, whoever, whoever dates me, is gonna be like.
Rachel:And then there's other days where it's like he's dating me as a charity he's doing a good deed.
Julia :He's a philanthropist. He saw this poor girl on the side of the road and he said I'll scoop her up and foster her until she finds her forever home.
Rachel:Like it's just it's. I think so many people can relate to the body. It might not be that you feel like a lost kitten on the side of the road, but it could I mean, it can totally be where you might need validation, or then you might even with that validation, you still go into this different headspace and we will do a full episode on body dysmorphia and we will probably retouch on exactly what we just talked about. But I think it does need to be talked about and how you know you can go through fitness journeys, you can go through weight loss journeys. You can feel good about yourself one day and maybe not so good about yourself the other days. But how do we maneuver around that and I don't think anyone's mastered that.
Rachel:If you have my number, it's just, it's something that everyone deals with and it just needs to be a little bit more like de-stigmatized, I think. But it's not. It's not.
Rachel:You're not like alone and feeling certain ways about your body but, there are healthy ways to go about that, and I think one way we do that is talking to each other, and we both know that, like we're also not going to lie to each other. No, like, find someone who you genuinely trust to talk to about that stuff yeah, because I think that does help and someone who kind of just be like no, like that's not accurate. No, and kind of really back down to earth, no, and so we'll definitely do a full episode on that and any sort of questions or anything with that, or personal experience that other people have, like share those with us. You know we'd love to talk about that and discuss that. So, concluding thoughts Julia Clued in thoughts.
Julia :I think that it is very important, when you engage with content online, that you whether it be weight loss, bulking, transformation related or not that you remember that there is a person behind those images and that person has made choices every minute of every day that have led to the results that you are seeing in this little square on a digital screen, sitting on your couch, like it is. It is so easy to lose perspective because you're literally looking like a peephole into people's lives, like it even looks like a freaking people, like you're peeping into people's lives and you're not seeing the effort things take, you're not seeing the sacrifice, you're not seeing the mental battles. And don't let that discourage you, but use it to make informed decisions, not only with how you proceed on your transformational journey, but also with how you interact with content.
Rachel:Yeah, I think that's great. So thank you guys for listening. I know that I think this is a longer episode than usual but it's just, you got a little chatty. This is something that we really, you know, focus on. I have a lot of weight loss clients, and that's something that I think a lot of people can relate to. So, with that being said, you can contact us at gggp underscore podcast on Instagram.
Julia :That is where we are most responsive. You can also reach out to us at gmail, at girls gains and growing pains, at gmailcom, and just follow our pages. Like I know personally, like just sitting doing this episode, I'm going to try and make an effort to post a lot more just like authentic like in the moment, just not as polished content, and so I'm going to use this episode as a little challenge.
Rachel:So follow our stuff, yeah, follow our stuff.
Julia :Follow the journey and turn your notifications on for the podcast on Spotify so you know when the new episodes come out.
Rachel:we've been good about getting those out on time, so please, please, please, do turn that on and share with your friends. Yes, we love to see it. We love to see it, so that has been another episode of girls gains and growing pains.